Thankful

Hello readers! It’s been awhile since I last published a post. Honestly? I haven’t felt motivated to write anything for months. Of course, with so much going on in the world, there are a myriad of topics I could have covered from a parenting/working mom perspective. What about…

The election? With the polarizing views in our country and the intensity leading up to November 3 and the days that followed, I was more inclined to stay on top of the news rather than write anything myself. Our family was glued to the TV and fervently hoped for a positive election outcome.  

As our current President fades into the background more and more each day,  I do think Ryan will miss all of the crazy Trump stories. Ryan has always loved bad behavior stories, and Trump was like a cartoon character to Ryan. Ryan often asked “What would Trump do?” or “What would Trump’s behavior be like?” when imagining Trump taking the place of Ryan or another family member in a situation they were facing. For example, when the WiFi didn’t work for 30 minutes one day during virtual school and Ryan was starting to get upset, he asked me, “What would Trump do if his Wifi didn’t work?” “I don’t know – what do you think?” I asked. “He would likely throw a fit. Maybe he’d throw his Chromebook,” Ryan said. “He just might do that,” I agreed. 

COVID-19? I just can’t.  I wrote a couple of blog posts earlier in the year when the lockdown first happened. These days, there is enough ongoing news on this topic from all angles, including parenting. And thinking about the upcoming cold winter and how isolated we’ll likely be is a bit depressing. No need to write about it. I am praying for the health and safety of everyone around the world and a quick dissemination of the vaccines! 

Whether or not to send my kids back to school when it opened as a hybrid option? I came close to writing about this one. I was undecided because there are good points to both sides, and I really vacillated on this topic. Physical health vs mental health and education. The boys wanted different things and were very vocal about their preferences. 

The week we had to make a decision:

Me to Dan: “I’ve been talking about this issue for weeks with the boys, and you haven’t weighed in much. What’s your opinion on all of this?”

Dan: “It’s too dangerous. I’m afraid of the long term repercussions of COVID. We shouldn’t send them back.” 

Me: “The school has a solid plan in place for keeping the kids safe. What about the mental health of our kids – especially Jordan, who is craving interaction and complains daily about technology issues? And Ryan will learn so much better in person. I’m not sure how much he’s getting out of the virtual classes.”

Dan: Oh, I didn’t think about the mental health side of things. That’s a really important factor. We should send them.”

Me “But what about the safety of our family? They could be infected and not have symptoms and pass it on to all of the older relatives. I’d never forgive myself if we got anyone sick.”

Dan… “Um…. I agree with whatever you eventually decide?”

In the end, physical health concerns won, and we kept them virtual. After only two weeks of being open, schools are now virtual again for the next two weeks across the county because of the rise in cases (not being spread in schools, but through get togethers, parties, etc.). 

The lack of Clorox wipes in stores?  I’m kidding. I didn’t actually consider that as a topic. Well, maybe a little bit. We’re almost finished our supply and I would be very grateful to get a box for Chanukah. How sad.

So then, what is there to write about? It’s been Groundhog Day since March. With the exception of a few amazing outdoor outings and one week in the Poconos, the highlight of almost any weekend is figuring out which bottle of wine to open and when, which Netflix series to begin or finish, and when to take an hour walk outside (if it’s not freezing or raining). Very exciting stuff.

And yet, despite this crazy, scary state of the world and a depressing 2020, there are things to be thankful for. In addition to the obvious – family, friends, health, employment, and healing for our country – I’m going to share a few smaller ones.

I am thankful for time with the family. As much as it gets old with everyone being in the house constantly and very little privacy, I was thinking the other day about how we’d hardly see Jordan if this were a typical junior year. And how rushed it would be each night with various activities and other obligations. Now we can eat dinner together, talk without feeling hurried, and take our time on weekends. Most Sundays we watch the Eagles as a family (not the best season, but hey, it’s quality time), where in the past, the game would be on multiple TVs and usually at least one of us was out of the house. When the boys graduate high school, I’ll know we took advantage of the precious time we would not have had in normal circumstances.

I’m thankful being at home gave Jordan a chance to explore his passion for songwriting through two School of Creative and Performing Arts (SOCAPA) programs. If there hadn’t been a pandemic, Jordan would have gone back to his camp for the 10th summer and never learned all of the music composition skills that led him to publish his first album (Candy Hearts – available on SoundCloud). He also would not have met a really cool group of kids from around the country who share his passion. Through this program, he changed his mind about what he wants to focus on in college and now has a solid list of schools to explore.

I’m thankful virtual school has helped Ryan become independent. He gets up on his own, logs on and off to various classes without any prompting, answers questions, figures out his work, and makes and cleans up his lunch. The only class Dan or I have to get involved in is the biweekly cooking, depending on the recipe.  Academically, I’m not sure how much he’s actually retaining, and I do believe in-person learning is better for him.  But when I think about last Spring and how much hand holding he needed from us, he has really come a long way.  

I’m thankful Dan and I both have jobs we can do from home. I’m especially glad that Dan, who spent a number of years in negative work environments, finally has a job at a company like mine, that values its employees. Of course I very much look forward to the day when I have the option to safely go to an office when I want to see other people, and to a time when I can safely travel somewhere around the world to run an in-person training. Virtual training is just not the same. (Ryan asked me the other day, “Mom, do you miss traveling to other countries?” I said, “I do. But at this point, taking the train to Center City for the day would be exotic.”) For now, though, I’ll enjoy sleeping later than I normally would have, having the time to exercise regularly, and wearing comfortable leggings to my home office every day. 

And finally, I’m thankful we had one celebratory morning with a very small group of people out of the house last weekend. My niece’s Bat Mitzvah service was probably one of the best days of the year. Approximately 25 people gathered with masks and spread out in our synagogue, and we were lucky to have the experience of watching and participating in the service, which was live streamed to others. Just being in the synagogue for the first time since March and spending a few hours with all of those people at once was good for the soul. (My niece was amazing – we were so proud of her!) 

I’ll leave you with a quick story and a lesson I learned that morning about masks. When we got to the synagogue, I put on my fancy black mask, which matched my black and white dress. I had an extra (back-up) mask in my bag. The service began, and I realized the fancy mask was very uncomfortable, and I was having trouble speaking and singing with it on. I pulled it off and replaced it with the back-up. This was much better, but the back-up mask didn’t match my dress at all. I was debating in my head comfort vs fashion, when the Rabbi said we were now moving to page 100, which was when my sister and I had to come up to the bimah for our Hallelujah duet. I made a fast decision – fashion (this would be on video forever, after all) – and quickly changed masks. Unfortunately, I put the fancy mask on backwards, and when I started singing, it kept moving down my face, under my nose. Throughout the entire song, I would pull it up, and it would fall down. (My nephew had a lot of fun laughing about how Aunt Jodi couldn’t keep her mask up.) Finally, I yanked it up really hard, hoping it would stay in place, and it went over my eyes. 

So my lesson is, if you are speaking or singing in public with a mask, practice ahead of time with your mask on to make sure it’s comfortable and fits well!  

Wishing you all a happy, healthy and safe Thanksgiving!